Dear Aunt Rufus,
I just feel safer with something in my teeth. I love the smell, the feeling of joy of having an old shoe on my mouth. My mom is always mad, so I must need help.
Just call me Chewy.
Dear Chewy,You need a new roll model - how about Chewbaca. He is the loyal friend and first mate of Dog Solo, and serves as co-pilot on Solo's spaceship, the Millennium Pointer. Chewbaca would never chew on a shoe.
Then ask your mom to buy you something wonderful to chew on, like a nice juicy steak!